Brockoff writes that the key is to consider the nature of the restaurant you are visiting and the attentiveness of its staff.
The more a server does for you, the more tip-worthy the encounter is...
[In a full-service restaurant] Servers should be knowledgeable, efficient and helpful. They should let the table set the pace, bringing each course when guests are ready for it (no entrees mid-salad, please) and making sure food arrives at the proper temperature. Most of all, servers should be available and attentive without being intrusive...
Such service warrants a 20 percent tip, although it's fine to leave 15 percent for a lesser performance. Merely acceptable -- the waitperson did little more than take orders and deliver food -- justifies 10 percent.
What if the service is downright horrendo? Etiquette Consultant Jodi R.R. Smith gives it to Brockoff straight:
Still leave a small gratuity, Smith says, as much as you might not want to.
"I do not leave a penny or handful of change as a tip to really stick it to them," Smith says. "Two rudes do not make a right."
Okay, so what about those rare occasions when PoliteMe is not dining at Per Se or Masa? Brockoff writes that when it comes to "delis, fast-food restaurants, coffee and doughnut shops and other venues where there is no waitstaff" you can skip the tip (although many of these places have a handy tip jar next to the cash register if you are feeling generous).
Brockoff writes that you can downsize your tip if you are in a buffet situation - one of those causal, homestyle joints where the server takes your drink order, tidies your table and leaves you to graze in peace. Ten to 15 percent is acceptable here, as well as in settings where customers place and pay for orders at a counter that are then delivered to the table by a server.
When it comes to ordering in, don't neglect the person who delivers your grub to your door; they deserve a few bucks for their trouble too.
photo credit: consumatron
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